Thursday, July 28, 2011
Not every day is bad, not every day is good
But today runs close. It's one of them, the days I wish I could have started over after the first five minutes but even then, the bad resets and drags me down. I tried. I really did. Tried and failed. But here is the fact of it all. No matter what I do badly no matter how poor my reaction is to events around, there will be a time that other things will become more important and the dregs of today's failure will fade away. Another day will take its place, be it good or bad. Days aren't good or bad, they are marks of time and time won't be halted, either by wish or prayer or demand. My feeling, my reactions, either are good or bad so why burden the entire day with them. Better yet to call it as it really is. I had a bad moment, I had a good moment. When I honestly total the score at the end of the day, I find it neither good nor bad. So the days pass as days will, moments pass as moments will. A bad day, a bad month, a bad year is usually no more than a few bad moments that effect me more deeply than the other moments that pass by unnoticed yet these moments may have had a smile, a laugh, a compliment. I dismiss them and grip the the worse and expand the moment into an entire day. How sad. I pray that my addition improve and I put reality into the equation.